Kasey's Comments - December

Decisions, Decisions!

On top of the custom designed Affinia Beds at our conference hotel are, literally, pillows.  Ah, but which pillows?  You see, we have choices.  Six of them. I like that, open a new window.  So much better than jumping out of the old one, right?

So, as I sip my “Signature Welcome Drink,” I can decide on the plain vanilla offerings of the medium-firm Down Pillow or the Hypo-Allergenic Pillow.  Yawn.

Or I could take a chance on the high-density, self molding Swedish Memory Pillow that — wait for it — “reacts to body temperature,” for coolness in summer, and warmth in the winter.

Then there’s the Sound Pillow.  Again, I have to quote, because this is just too wild:  “Buried deep in the hypoallergic fiberfill, the ultra thin i-speakers create an intimate and soothing sound experience.  Simply plug into your MP3 player, CD player or radio.”  No, I’m not kidding!

The Magnetic Therapy Pillow reduces swelling and discomfort, relieves insomnia and fatigue, soothes tense muscles – and may start the coffeemaker in the morning, but don’t take that as gospel.  Lastly, there’s the Buckwheat Pillow, for stress reduction. 

Except now I’ve got the stress of wondering which pillow type I should ask for!

Happily, there’s no stress at all involved with worrying if my hotel room is going to feel like it’s the same size as the elevator I ride up to my floor, because each room is a suite.  Living room, bedroom, and a full kitchen (yeah, like I’m going to cook a rump roast or something — but I could!).  An ergonomic desk chair will be pulled up to the “executive workstation,” where high-speed internet access also awaits.  

I can work out in the large Fitness Room (I would suggest not holding your breath waiting for me to show up there), and then spruce up using the complimentary, high-end Aveda toiletries provided daily.  I can even ask for a (again, free) package of Airline Restrictions amenities that won’t set off alarms at the airport — a package that includes toothpaste, shaving cream, hair spray, nail polish remover, deodorant, contact lens solution, mouthwash, plus shampoo, conditioner and body lotion.  Too cool — and I’m only taking the bus from Pennsylvania!

Room service, great restaurants that serve dinner until eleven p.m., a Boarding Pass Kiosk to ease airline travel, hourly shuttle service at a reasonable cost, and the Concierge Center is always available.  You can even bring your pet to town with you if you want and the hotel will provide someone to walk Fido for you.  Personally, I’d draw the line at the Pet Psychic service, but that’s just me.

Oh yeah, folks, this is New York.  This is the Big Apple.  This is the pampered author time we all deserve now and then — and all at fantastic low conference rates.  Until the rooms allotted are all booked, that is, and those are first come, first pampered, you know!

But that’s all, well, that’s all gravy (from that rump roast I’m not cooking, remember?).  What’s important, really important, is that the Affinia Manhattan is also providing the meat-ing space (shame on me … sorry!) for the Open A New Window Novelists, Inc. 2008 Conference.

I’ve already circled all the workshops on promotion, and can’t wait to learn more about online advertising and book trailers and blogging — and what the hell podcasting is and if it includes aliens or Sigourney Weaver.

I’ll be front and center For Robert Gottlieb’s The Art of the Deal, taking notes as PW Executive Editor and others let me know What’s New in the World of Publishing, and I’m prepared for a gloves-off frank workshop on Taking Chances in Publishing from NYT’s bestselling author Jennifer Crusie and St. Martin’s own Jennifer Enderlin.

And that’s only three out of so very many intense workshops planned for March 27-30 in New York City.  I’ll be reporting in on more next month including, perhaps, my decision on pillows.

Buckwheat?  They put buckwheat in pillows now?  Really?

I definitely have to get out more …

Conference at a Glance

• March 27-30, 2008
• Affinia Manhattan
• Hotel Room: $219/night
• Conference Registration: $360

     —Kasey Michaels,
        Ninc President-elect 2008